I am overwhelmed with thoughts about Mary, mother of Jesus, this morning. We watched an awesome movie last night, called The Nativity Story. If you haven't seen this movie, I HIGHLY suggest you watch it! It was so good to go into another Christmas season, having watched this. One thing, especially, that really stuck out to me, and is just driving me back to the thought of the "crucified life" or the "surrendered life" (as we so often call this Christian life), is Mary's circumstances in the story. I mean, I know we all have thought about how shameful it was for her to be with child, when she was not married and was betrothed to Joseph. This clearly was not Joseph's child, so she was thought to be unfaithful. That is huge, but to me its deeper than that. I just look first at the Lord sending Gabriel to tell her the news that she will conceive a child that is the Son of God! (I don't think I can even begin to imagine being visited by an angel, nor being told I will conceive when I am still a virgin, and that it will be the Son of God...that is just insane). Mary, supposedly being very young, responded like this: "Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word." She is surrendered! She is not questioning, she is not complaining, she is not saying "no way!" She simply says "whatever you want, Lord." Its so amazing that Mary, the mother of Jesus, before Jesus was even conceived, was denying herself, giving up her life and what she had planned,and carrying her "cross" as Jesus would later demand of his disciples in Luke 9.
So....now the thoughts of the reality of bearing this child. The shame would be huge! The movie did a great job of showing the humiliation she endured. Friends and family turning their backs on her and treating her as if she was a whore. Then trying to explain it to her family and to Joseph when she returns from her visit w/ Elizabeth. How could anyone believe her? It sounded nuts! But, she didn't waver. I'm sure she had human thoughts and emotions, but she knew God was doing something great in and through her and she would stand firm in the truth. (Does this hit home w/ you? It does for me as we have had to explain things to friends and family-things that God has called us to, that he has asked of us, knowing that sometimes we are thought of as fools). And then there is Joseph, who would've suffered great embarrassment over his "betrothed" being pregnant, and not by him. But I love what the Matthew account says of him in Matt 1:19, that "he was a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly" Even this was huge. The penalty for unfaithfulness in that time, could be death. He could say the word and have justice by having her stoned. Isn't that what we would want, justice? When we are wronged and embarrassed and shamed by someone else?
Ok, so then the angel visits Joseph and tells him that Mary is indeed carrying the Son of God and he is to take her as a wife. He is called back to Bethlehem b/c of the census (which fulfills prophecy, so cool!) and Mary must go with him. Think about this-Mary at this point is probably 8 close to 9 months pregnant, she is to now make a ridiculously long journey (the movie says 100 miles, not sure if thats accurate or not) and she is to do it on a donkey! For those of you that have been 9 months pregnant, can you imagine this? I can't. At that point in my pregnancies, I was all about my own comfort, and sadly, wanted everyone else to be too. But, she wants to go, and so she does! Again, the movie displays the journey really well. It really shows all the hardships of a trip like that in that day. So, at this point, I was thinking "God, why wouldn't you give Mary all the comforts and pleasures she could possibly want? Why would you not only make her bear all that shame and humiliation but now make her endure all these hardships of a journey at the end of her pregnancy, with Your Son? Doesn't she deserve better? And there it is....we (I) still think that when we serve the Lord, and do what he asks of us, we will not suffer, we will not be humiliated, or shamed in any way. We will have good things in this life....we will have it easy. Isn't that what He wants for us? That may sound silly, but I don't think its too far off from what we all think or maybe what we expect from God. But, He is showing me that even Mary, the "blessed among women" was to carry her cross (Luke 9), to "consider the reproach of Christ greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt" (Hebrews 11:26).
So, here it is, they arrive in Bethlehem just in time. Mary is in labor and needs to find somewhere to birth this child. Joseph frantically tries to find a place and there is nothing! Again, I am asking "God! Would you not atleast provide a room for her to give birth to this baby? She has already endured so much. Please, have mercy!" But, instead, they are led to a stinking, filthy stable, complete with animals, and I'd imagine, animal poop, pee, insects, germs, etc... Now think about the sterile, comfortable hospitals we deliver babies in. Or even, home births are comfortable, sterile, calm....can you imagine giving birth to your first baby, with a man you barely know, in those conditions? I absolutely can not, and I even think "would I be willing to?" There it is again, the question of surrender. Would I be willing to go wherever he asks and do whatever he asks? Shouldn't there be limits?.....
Jesus left the right hand of the Father in Heaven, to be become a Son of man, to be born in those conditions, to become the "life and light of men" (John 1:4), to live to do the will of the Father, knowing he would die a horrible death on a cross so he could bring salvation to you and me. What He asks of us in return, is our surrender, our lives....is that really too much to ask?
So as I ponder these things, it also brings me back to this Christmas season. I have loved Christmas for as long as I can remember. But, I want it to be different. We say this alot, but really, why are we obsessed w/ decorations, food, a ridiculous amount of presents?What does this have to do Jesus' birth? Mary had no decorations and comforts. Jesus had no clothes! He was wrapped in rags and laid in a dirty manger. How do we celebrate our Savior's birth and not be drawn back into the world's way of twisting it into a celebration completely about ourselves? Better yet, how do we live in light of this all year, every day...every moment, and not just at Christmas?
This is a lot, I know...but this is reality! I read today's reading in My Utmost for His Highest, by Oswald Chambers.(If you don't have this book, get it! Its filled with wonderful truths.) The title for today was "A Bond-Slave of Jesus" and the verse he uses is Galations 2:20 "I am crucified with Christ; nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me." I want to leave you with his explanation of these verses:
"These words mean the breaking of my independence with my own hand and surrendering to the supremacy of the Lord Jesus. No one can do this for me, I must do it myself. God may bring me up to the point three hundred and sixty five times a year, but He cannot put me through it. It means breaking the husk of my individual independence of God, and the emancipating of my personality into oneness with Jesus.....Has that break come? All the rest is pious fraud. The one point to decide is-Will I give up, will I surrender to Jesus Christ, and make no conditions whatever as to how the break comes? I must be broken from my self-realization, and immediately that point is reached, the reality of the supernatural identification takes place at once, and the witness of the Spirit of God is unmistakable-"I have been crucified with Christ." The passion of Christianity is that I deliberately sign away my own rights and become a bond-slave of Jesus Christ. Until I do that, I do not begin to be a saint....Is He going to help Himself to us, or are we taken up with our conception of what we are going to be?"
Side note: In Luke 1: 38 when Mary says "Behold, I am the servant of the Lord" the greek word for "servant" is "bond-servant" or bond-slave." See Deuteronomy 15:16-17 for more on "Bond-Slaves."
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